names are changed to protect the innocent...
the other day my best friend told me that her 10-yr. old son was taking ritalin. it came up in conversation, it wasn't like she sat me down to tell me. but it was still a notable conversation. i love my best friend with all my heart and she has been in my life forever and she is an amazing person. i was bummed because i don't like the idea of those types of drugs. just like i don't think it's the FCC's responsibility to protect children from the TV or the internet. i tend to think that people give up personal responsibility too quickly, especially when it comes to parenting.
but i she's my best friend and i can't just be all highandmighty now can i! she's the bombdiggity so listened to her tell me the story and tried not to be judgemental because i KNOW she's a great mom. she loves her kids so much and she is so patient and just so involved with them and their school and activities so because i know her so well i know that it's not a matter of just medicating the kid to abdicate any responsibility from disciplining him or paying attention to him.
anyway, she made mention of something and i said oh is K-man on ritalin? and she said oh yeah, you didn't know? and i said "no. does he know he's on it? do you tell him why he has to take something or do you slip him a mickey? lol"
"oh my god i havent' told you this story? oh, well you know he's had problems in school and his behavior... we've had problems with him hitting since he was four..."
"yeah i remember"
"he's not violent he just can't keep his hands to himself. if he's in line for something he could fine one minute and then the next minute he's flicking someone's ear. or he's in math and midway throough he just bursts out 'I FOUND A REALLY COOL BUG AT RECESS WANNA SEE IT?' and off to the principal's office. he's just so impulsive and non-linear in his thinking he's all over the place. so we've tried everything with him. talking to him, time outs. telling him when he's in lunch line or around lots of kids to keep his hands in his pockets. or if a kid takes his ball to go get the teacher not just pounce on the kid. he just doesn't think first, he just acts and then he's sooo remorseful."
"so after lots and lots of meetings with his teachers i asked them about it. you know they can't straight up recommend that i guess it's illegal or something but they agreed that it might be a good option for him. so i had been talking to the pediatrician and the child psychologist and we decided to maybe try it. and i asked him when was a good time to do this because i didn't want K-man to miss too much school and the psychologist commented that typically parents don't bring the kid in. and i told him well this is for him and i want him to know what's going on and why. i can't just drug him or something he's a good kid and smart and this has to be up to him."
"so Focker (her husband), K-man and i go to the meeting and the psychologist was explaining a little what was going on. and so he explained directly to K-man why they were there. He said when i was younger i was constantly in the wrong place in class, i was on the wrong page, i couldn't understand what was written on the board and it made school so hard for me. and my mom took me to the doctor and it turns out i needed glasses. once i got my glasses the world became more clear to me and school was less hard because i was back on the right page i could see the board. it was like a door in my mind was closed and the glasses opened them up for me. now, there are things that are making it hard for you to concentrate in class and think straight and not act out. it's like you have a door too that's closed and what if i told you there was something i could give you that would open up that door. and things might become more clear for you and make class better. K-man, would you like something like that?'
and k-man said: 'well yes, doctor, i would like to try something like that. i mean i can't keep my hands in my pockets forever and some days i don't even have pockets in my pants so i need something.'
"so the doctor starts telling focker and i options and stuff and then he says lets try this prescription for awhile and bring him in in four weeks or so and see how we're doing. and then he says do you have any questions? and i had a few questions and then focker asked him something and then finally he looked at K-man and said 'now K-man, do you have any questions for me?'"
"and k-man said, 'um i don't think so. well, except, um, when do i have to get the glasses?'"
oh man i laughed so hard and then i gave that little man the biggest hug the next time i saw him.
