don't know why but i took this from an old AL post and wanted to put it here:

Hmmm i have to describe 5 attributes of how i think you see me…well, i guess since this is a truth i should start with a confession: those pictures i sent you are from a playboy magazine so when you think you see ME you’re actually seeing a six foot blonde by the name of pussy galore.

Sorry about that…

*exhale*

Ok, that was one. wow this is so much easier than i thought! Lol

I would be willing to admit that there may be a chasm with regards to how i see certain characteristics of myself and how you see them, but then i think there are others that we are in agreement. I’m assuming you want me to focus on the ones where we differ to some degree. 

if i think back over our friendship i would have to say it started when you saw some of my drawings. And it grew from there. i would say that i like to draw and paint but i never considered myself that great, in fact, i subscribed to the fallacy that if i have to work at it, even if i enjoy it and experience moderate success with it (i.e. people liking it, not the financial kind), then i’m not really that talented, that i’m not really an artist. You know the raging, ear-cut-off, psycho genius that could create images that move people (and make lots and lots of fucking money after i’m dead), you see me as much more talented than how i do. I also know that when you start gushing i get very hot and my face turns red and i stutter. Lol. I know that you see me as someone that has a lot to offer the world and that i have no right to keep the things that i create to myself. I know that you see me as someone who should accept LOTS of money for those things. I know that if you continue to be my agent then you will try to get me a lot of work and that i will just be so happy if i see something i created published. I know that if i do make money off of my drawings you will never let me handle it. lol. I also know we will fight about this for yeeeeeeeeeears, because so far i’ve done what you wanted simply because you freaking wore me down. :*

Whenever i hear my voice on a tape or on my voice mail i cringe. I think many people have that reaction regarding their own voices, but that aside, i have in no way been impressed with my voice on tape. In fact on numerous occasions in the past i have been mistaken for my mother when i answer the phone. And if you really want to prevent me from slamming a shovel against the back of your head, then you should NEVER EVER NEVER NEVER NEVER say that to me.

** *deep breath* sorry, was that outloud? Hee. Side note, if your mother rocks or is even just normal and not a psychopathic, fake, selfish, revisionist historian, serial marrying woman with abusive husbands then please call her or give her a hug.

Issue over. **
Anywaaaaaaaay…I know that you think my voice is warm and in certain unplanned moments, quite sexy (i so know you’re blushing right now – heh). I know that you will listen to me forever while i describe the most detailed story about a concert i attended, a trip to the aquarium, a conference i attended, and my research – to name a few. I know when i catch myself gushing i can hear a little dreamy, shy voice on the other end sigh, and then a muppet-y enthusiastic voice begging me to continue when i suddenly become self-conscious. I know that when i cry it upsets you. i know when i cry because i’m upset with you, it wrecks you.

I know that you think i’m brilliant, witty and funny; but i know you think you’re funnier…

I know that i think i’m pretty durn smart and that most of what i have attained in my life is just from brute force hard fucking work, but you think i’m incredibly intelligent and i will do good things for the environment during my life. Which is what i want, and you support that completely. but i also drive you nuts because i’m always broke and don’t manage my money. SHUDDUP

I know you think i masturbate waaaaaay too much. And i know not much is going to change about that... lol

I know you’re worried shakira really is my girlfriend.

I know you’re afraid i’m going to meet you at the airport wearing a strap-on.

OMG i fucking crack myself up! OMG! I sound like you! heh

Ok i think that’s more than five, so yayyy bonus. Lol

So, i hope the last remaining four members of AL enjoyed that. I hope that it is to LL’ satisfaction. I’m sorry that you had to wait this long and it wasn’t fantastic. but goddammit this required thinking.